By the time we become adults we develop a basic understanding of how bank accounts work. We may feel like we’re really bad at it, but we at least know that we put money in; hopefully, it sticks around for a little while and when we need it, we take out money to live. We also might have some idea that we can’t withdraw more money than we have in there or bad things happen.
What most of us aren’t consciously aware of is that we also have an energy bank account that works much the same way, except that here our interactions with life build, store or deplete energy from our living BodyMind System. This is the amount of energy we have on hand at any moment to live.
There are many factors at play affecting our energy account. On a physical level our food choices, exercise, amount of sleep, lifestyle, sunlight, fresh air, and time in nature all affect our energy level. Our psychoemotional and Autonomic Nervous System states also contribute far more than we realize.
Energy In – Energy Out
Energy, which is where I’d like to start, underlies all the others, because it’s this aspect that is least understood or spoken about.
My question to clients is often, What in your life, lights you up inside? Another way of saying that is, what energizes you? And, conversely, what sucks the life out of you? When put this way, people don’t even have to think about it, they know immediately. There are parts of our day, of our job, and aspects of our relationships that drain us. Certain kinds of interactions or certain individuals cause us to involuntarily cringe inside.
Now think about how much of your energy currency you’re spending on these things. Does it feel like your world is constantly sucking the life out of you?
Consider the things that recharge your account. It can be simple things like a walk on the beach, meeting up with friends, alone time, meditation, a nap, bodywork and self-care, a hot bath, or yoga class. Take a moment to consider your life in relation to your energy bank account. Is there a lot of energy-currency in there? Or are you, like so many, energetically bankrupt without even realizing it. It’s not even that you’re at zero, but running at a continual energy deficit.
One of the constant complaints I hear is, “I want to exercise, go for a walk, meditate, etc. but I’m just too tired at the end of the day or there’s no time.” Most people have never considered the state of their energy bank account. Often we are running in the red, so there is nothing in there to draw on. Many of the activities we consider doing to recharge, like the ones I just mentioned, are net gains. We need to spend energy to get even more back, but if we’re bankrupt that well is dry. There’s literally no energy to draw on.
My recommendation is to start with things that take little or no effort: a hot bath, receiving bodywork, a brief easy walk or watching the sunset, with no expectation except for letting the energy in. Make it a conscious intent, “I’m taking time to recharge my battery.” What else can you do with minimal or NO energy output, that maximizes energy input? Little by little you’ll start building it back up.
Next, you also need to turn off the tap where you’re bleeding out energy. This might take some time and planning to implement, because it may mean drastic changes to your relationships, job, or lifestyle. You might need to outsource or delegate the aspects of your work/life that deplete you the most.
The people who do best with a terminal medical diagnosis, use that as a catalyst to completely transform their lives. They ask the question, “Does this serve my life or is it killing me?” They prune the deadwood from their world and cultivate everything that brings joy, laughter, meaning and peace.
New moms are often/always running at an energy deficit. It’s kind of part of the deal, especially if this is not their first child. On minimal sleep and with constant demands from all aspects of life, there is little time for self-care to replenish their account. Theirs is a unique challenge that requires planning for a marathon rather than a sprint. They MUST build-in resources to lighten the load, and carve out ‘me-time’ wherever they can in order to thrive.
Think about the relationships in your life that drain off more energy than they give back. That can be a hard one, especially if you’re a people pleaser. If you want to live a long happy life YOU need to make you a priority, no one else can or will. Bring in more things that make you crazy happy! If you build the wealth in your account, you will have the energy to do what makes life meaningful.
Aging
There are numerous reports of people retiring and dying shortly afterward. Often our identity is tied to our work. When that goes away we struggle to find our value to the world. A similar phenomenon happens to empty-nesters whose identity was tied to being mom or dad. Looking at this through the lens of our energy bank account we can see how purpose fuels our Lifeforce.
Additionally, the older we get, less of our life is ahead of us while more is behind. When we continually look back on all our wonderful memories and feel we have nothing ‘good’ to look forward to, we deplete our energy account. It is therefore critical to have positive things to anticipate and a reason to be here — something in life that REQUIRES our continued existence. Many find it in volunteering with a cause they believe in, taking care of grandkids and great-grandkids, working part-time, or finally doing that thing they put off their whole lives.
JOY feeds our account more than anything!
Avoidance
We often run our energy low, purposely, to avoid making the changes in our lives that we know we need to make, to do the things we know we need to do, or to end or transform an unhealthy relationship or job.
We are all, to some degree, guilty of procrastination and avoidance. Fear of the unknown keeps us locked into familiar patterns that have long since served us. But these situations also drain the life out of us. Sometimes in small inconspicuous ways, but often it’s in our faces and we still can’t find the courage to step forward into that new reality.
My advice is, as soon as you recognize the universe pushing, go with it! Don’t resist the impetus! It may not be comfortable at first but it will free up a great deal of repressed energy.
Autonomic States
Neuroscientists estimate that 95 percent of brain activity is beyond our conscious awareness. It’s as if we are going through life on autopilot. Our Autonomic Nervous system (ANS) is the actual mechanism that controls this subconscious autopilot and controls our body’s physiology. (see my Polyvagal Theory blog where I go into much more detail about these states)
We have 3 aspects of our ANS at play, our Safety Mode (Rest & Rebuild), Activation (Fight or Flight) and Deactivation (Freeze or Collapse). Unless we are anchored in our Safety Mode, persistent protective states of Activation and Deactivation will continually drain our energy bank account.
Energy Nutrition
You are what you eat! It’s a universal maxim that happens to actually, literally be true. What goes into your body becomes your body, it’s what every cell is made from. Yet, more often than not, what, when, and how much we eat happens in order to stuff or calm our emotions, out of habit, as a reward, because of social obligation, as a quick pick-me-up, etc.
When we look at diet from an energetic perspective, we consider how our foods are affecting this bank account. How much energy does something take for the body to break down and utilize versus how much energy is it giving back? Polarity Therapy founder, Dr. Randolph Stone, DO, ND, DC, looked at nutrition from this perspective, advocating energy-dense foods that are easily digestible.
There are numerous universal principles that you can probably rattle off because we all hear them from every quarter — more organic fruits and vegetables, more live-raw or lightly steamed versus fried or overcooked, less or no meat, and so on. No matter where you are with your diet there is ALWAYS room for improvement — a next level.
The truth is, it’s a ever shifting target, because what your body needs at any given time is in response to what’s already in there. It needs more of what it doesn’t have and less of what it has too much of. It continually seeks a moving balance-point between building healthy tissue and cleansing the waste.
You are the chemist and your body is your ongoing experiment. Be a wise scientist/detective. Do your research, get hard data on your current physiological state (like a gut biome test, etc.), then meticulously observe how your body responds to what you put in. You might want to keep a journal to note what you eat, when, how much, and the circumstances. Your body’s response may come hours later or over the course of days which is why writing it down can be helpful. Also, you may be shocked at what you ‘conveniently’ omit out of guilt — even if you’re the only one reading it, hmmm!
Do you get tired or need to nap after eating? Are you irritable, frustrated, anxious? Do you have a headache, indigestion or heatburn? Immediate diarrhea? Any adverse response may indicate ingredients, preparations or amounts that are challenging for your system to process. At first you may overlook some of the signs, but the cleaner your diet gets, the more sensitive you will become to notice the tiniest tings that throw off your digestion.
I’ll go into more detail on diet in a later blog. There is so much more to be said on this topic.
Conclusion
Bottom line, begin to consider each aspect of your life from the perspective of your energy bank account. What feeds your Lifeforce and what drains it? If you only had a finite amount of time to live, what would you change about your life? What is your deadwood that needs to go? What have you been putting off til ‘someday’? There’s no better time to make your life what you want it to be!
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